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让世界拥有它的脚步，让我保有我的茧。当溃烂已极的心灵再不想作一丝一毫的思索时，就让我静静的回到我的茧内，以回忆为睡榻，以悲哀为覆被。这是我唯一的美丽。
曾经，每一度春光惊讶着我赤热的心肠。怎么回事呀？它们开得多美!我没有忘记自己睁在花前的喜悦。大自然一花一草生长的韵律，教给我再生的秘密。像花朵对于季节的忠实，我听到杜鹃颤微微的倾诉。每一度春天之后，我更忠实于我所深爱的。
如今，仿佛春已缺席。
突然想起，只是一阵冷寒在心里，三月春风似剪刀啊！
有时，把自己交给街道，交给电影院的椅子。那一晚，莫名其妙地去电影院，随便坐着，有人来赶，换了一张椅子，又有人来要，最后，乖乖掏票看个仔细，摸黑去最角落的座位，才是自己的。被注定了的，永远便是注定。突然了悟，一切要强都是徒然，自己的空间早已安排好了，一出生，便是千方百计往那个空间推去，不管愿不愿意，乖乖随着安排，回到那个空间，告别缤纷的世界，告别我所深爱的，回到那个一度逃脱，以为再也不会回去的角落。当铁栅的声音落下，我晓得，我再也出不去了。
我含笑躺下，摊开偷回来的记忆，一一捡点。也许，是知道自己的时间不多，也许，很宿命地直觉到终要被遣回，当我进入那缤纷的世界，便急着把人生的滋味一一尝遍。很认真，也很死心塌地。一衣一衫，都还有笑声，还有芳馨。我要仔细收藏的，毕竟得来不易。在最贴心的衣袋里，有我最珍惜的名字，我仍要每天唤几次，感觉那一丝温暖。它们全曾真心真意待着我。如今在这方黑暗的角落，怀抱着它们入睡，已是我唯一能做的报答。
够了，我含笑地躺下，这些已够我做一个美丽的茧。
每天，总有一些声音在拉扯我，拉我离开心狱，再去找一个新的世界，一切重新再来。 她们比我还珍惜我，她们千方百计要找那把锁解我的手铐脚镣，那把锁早已被我遗失。我甘愿自裁，也甘愿遗失。
对一个疲惫的人，所有的光明正大的话就像一个个彩色的泡沫。对一个意志薄弱的生命，又怎能命它去铸坚强的字句？如果死亡是唯一能做的，那么就任它的性子吧！这是慷慨。
强迫一只蛹去破茧，让它落在蜘蛛的网里，是否就是仁慈？
所有的鸟儿都以为，把鱼举在空中是一种善举。
有时很傻地暗示自己，去走同样的路，买一模一样的花，听熟悉的声音，遥望那扇窗，想象小小的灯还亮着，一衣一衫装扮自己，以为这样，便可以回到那已逝去的世界，至少现在，闭上眼睛，感觉自己真的在缤纷之中。
如果，有醒不了的梦，我一定去做；
如果，有走不完的路，我一定去走；
如果，有变不了的爱，我一定去求；
如果，如果什么都没有，那就让我回到宿命的泥土！这三十年的美好，都是善意的谎言，我带着最美丽的那部分，一起化作春泥。
可是，连死也不是卑微的人所能大胆妄求的。时间像一个无聊的守狱者，不停地对我玩着黑白牌理。空间像一座大石磨，慢慢地磨，非得把人身上的血脂榨压竭尽，连最后一滴血水也不剩下时，才肯利落的扔掉。世界能亘古地拥有不乱的步伐，自然有一套残忍的守则和过滤的方式。生活是一个刽子手，刀刃上没有明天。
面对临暮的黄昏，想着过去。一张张可爱的脸孔，一朵朵的笑声......一分一秒的年华......一些黎明，一些黑夜......一次无限温柔生的奥妙，一次无限狠毒死的要挟。被深爱过，也深爱过。认真地哭过，也认真地求生，认真地在爱。如今呢？......人世一遭，不是要学认真地恨，而是要来领受我所该得的一份爱。在我活的第三十三个年头，我领受了这份赠礼，我多么兴奋地去解开漂亮的结，祈祷是美丽与高贵的礼物。当一对碰碎了的晶莹琉璃在我颤抖的手中，我能怎样，认真地流泪，然后呢？然后怎样？回到黑暗的空间，然后又怎样？认真地满足。
当铁栅的声音落下，我知道，我再也无法出去。
趁生命最后的余光，再仔仔细细检视一点一滴，把鲜明生动的日子装进，把熟悉的面孔，熟悉的一言一语装进，把生活的扉页，撕下那页最重最钟爱的，也一并装入，自己要一遍又一遍地再读。把自己也最后装入，甘心在二十岁，收拾一切灿烂的结束。把微笑还给昨天，把孤单留给自己。
让懂的人懂。
让不懂的人不懂；
让世界是世界，
我甘心是我的茧。
文/简桢
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